Cliché
by Individually Packaged
Summary: Overused expression: a phrase or word that has lost its original effectiveness or power from overuse... but what does that really mean? Beast Boy x Raven. Discontinued.
1. Normal Unlike You

**Cliché**

Overused expression: a phrase or word that has lost its original effectiveness or power from overuse... but what does that really mean? Beast Boy x Raven

**a/n:**

_Sorry to thedude that wrote "Normal Like You", don't get the chapter name wrong. We love that story, but we like twisting things, too. If you're uncomfortable with us using that name then message us... or something. _

BB/Rae and Teen Titan fanfic clichés make Cid and Aia sad. Especially when BB cuts himself and Rave commits suicide. Cy isn't all that bad! Why are you so prejudiced against the electronically enhanced folks? Star isn't a prep and Robbie-pooh isn't interested in anyone other than Starfire (unless you count Slade).

Oh and BB does... not... SWEAR! (Maybe a little in the comics, but this is in the cartoon section, isn't it?)

Okay, now that we're done ranting we can start. You get a cybernetic cookie if you can identify all the spoofs and clichés we've either included or poked fun at (which is impossible, unless you have major telepathy).

Just think of this fan fiction as one big inside-joke.

* * *

"There's nothing more annoying than when you can't play your tuba in the bathtub." – Beast Boy

* * *

**Normal Unlike You**

"Yo, Raven! Tell me... what are your feelings for me?"

"Oh, BB! I like, totally like you, like yeah! I mean, like, who wouldn't? Your awesome powers are like soooo like, cool! And your kitty face is like, the awesomest. It's like so kyoooot!"

"Sweet! So you think I'm cool?"

"Duh! You're like the best-looking guy I've ever like, met!"

"And you think my jokes are funny?"

"Like, yeah!"

"And you don't think this spandex makes me look fa—"

"Beast Boy," Starfire interrupted, "I am sorry to disrupt your playing of the pretend— but may I join you?"

"Sure, Star. You can have this part of the stage." He motioned to an unoccupied area on the miniature puppet theater. A small wooden version himself and Raven was sprawled out on the timber stage.

"Thank you," she replied before setting herself on the floor and picking up a puppet replica of herself. "Robin, you do not wish to participate with us?"

"There you are, Slade! Of course, I should have suspected it! On the cover of Glamour Girl. How ingenious... I mean, no Starfire, I think I found a new lead on Slade. You go on without me!" He replied from a stack of magazines.

"Very well, Robin." Starfire turned back to playing with her marionette.

Beast Boy was too absorbed in his monologue to notice.

"Okay, Raven. Second question: How does it feel to be in the same room as me?"

"Like, cool, like dude! You're like the awesomest guy ever and like--"

"Ugh, how can you stand those things?" Cyborg shuddered from the couch. "That puppet dude still gives me the creeps!" He shivered again before turning back to Mega Monkey 4.

"Dude, the guy was just misunderstood! He was too obsessed about being Pinocchio. It was obvious he wanted world peace." Beast Boy pointed at Robin, "Like him!"

Robin didn't comment.

"Well, his remote control was creepy enough. And so was his face."

"How can a remote control be creepy?"

"It—uh... it was just creepy, okay?"

"Yeah... okay dude, whatever you say." Beast Boy finished off slyly.

Cyborg snorted indignantly. "You don't believe me, little man?"

"Sure I do, Cy. I just had no idea remote controls could look creepy."

"Well if the guy was creepy, then so was his remote!"

"Your logic is quite intriguing, Cyborg," Starfire interrupted the argument.

"See? Star thinks he's creepy too."

No comment.

"BB?"

Alas, Beast Boy's attention span was quite limited: he went back to playing with the marionettes.

"So, Raven... What's your opinion on-- TOFU!"

"It's like the best, like _ever_! And I totally didn't mean it when I like, dissed it. I mean, the soybeans are like so like yummy, and like good and like... yummy! And you know who else is like, yummy? Dude, like you ar—"

"_What_ is going on here?" The fourth interruption was voiced.

"Uh—Raven! Dude, you're like—here! I mean, you just appeared—from nowhere... Creepy."

Raven had inconspicuously come amongst the normal happenings of the Teen Titans' everyday afternoon life. Her hood was pulled back and the expression on her face was one quite priceless—even Beast Boy noted that.

"Why are you playing 'House' on the living room carpet? And what are you doing with my puppet replica?" Her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"Um... I was totally not making you say things with the dolly-thing... right, guys?" Beast Boy laughed uncertainly.

"But, Beast Boy... is that not what you were doing? I believe that is what you call the 'speaking for Raven', yes?" Starfire said from her place on the floor, her marionette suspended from three strings and a wooden cross.

"... _Maybe_...?"

"Beast Boy—" Raven began menacingly.

"So, who wants some ice-cream?" Cyborg pitched in to stabilize the route of the conversation. "I'll look in the fridge to see the kinds we've got."

While Cyborg went about his task, Raven gave Beast Boy another ominous look before going into the kitchen for her daily tea.

"Phew, I thought Raven was gonna throw me out the window for that one." He took a mischievous look at the Raven marionette before furtively picking it up again and saying, "But seriously, Raven, you think I'm cool, right?"

"Of course, BB. You're like the cutest dude like, ever! And I totally love your like, cute purple span—"

"BEAST BOY!"

He winced.

"What do you think you're doing?" Raven conjured a face that might have beaten that of Trigon's. Her quick reappearance from the kitchen did not distress anyone.

"Nothing! I was just—uh, um... playing with uh...your puppet? See, um...watch."

Beast Boy picked up the marionette and twisted it to face the infuriated Raven.

"Look, I'm Raven! The cool person on the Titan team who's totally not about to kill Beast Boy right now."

Raven's face darkened.

"--And um... who almost destroyed the Earth— _once_-- but that's like-- okay!"

He added hastily.

Raven's eyes glowed white.

"'Cause uh... the Titans are totally okay with that! Happens to every dude—"

Raven's mouth quirked into a menacing growl.

"--I mean, uh, that's not what I meant!"

Raven's cloak non-gravitationally flew open.

"Eek!—_please don't kill me, Raven_!"

The puppet theater trembled, engulfed in black energy, while the Raven replica in Beast Boy's hand was sent sprawling to the floor. Beast Boy finished off his last prayer.

Suddenly, Raven's cloak stopped billowing, her face cleared, and her eyes regained their normal appearance. She drew up her hood and glared at Beast Boy.

"Whatever. I don't ever want to see those things again... got it?"

Upon realizing that Raven was not about to murder him, Beast Boy took his chances.

"Dude, Raven! Did you just loose control of your powers?"

She snorted in reply, before turning her back on him and walking back into the kitchen, where her tea pot was spewing out vapor. She poured herself a cup of tea and added a few tablespoons of sugar.

Beast Boy did not surrender his upper hand on the situation.

"You did loose control, Raven! That's so unlike you—I mean, it's like the time you fought Dr. Light and you had to beat Tri—"

"Shut it, Beast Boy."

"But you do that weird-thingie—meditute or something—everyday! More like every hour, like of every minute, like of every—"

"I said, 'shut it'."

"Dude, did you give your emotions more freedom or something?"

Raven turned to Beast Boy. "Don't be an idiot. I'd never let my emotions have more freedom—you realize the devastation that would cause?"

"But, that would be so awesome! Then Happy could laugh at all of my jokes and—"

"No. I'd never let that happen. The consequences would be too great. I'm never letting my emotions have more sovereignty."

"Sweet! So you'll do it?"

"No. I. Will. Not." She said through gritted teeth.

"Please, Ravie—"

"Don't call me Ravie. I hate that name. And no—the idea is obstreperous and dangerous."

"Pweasie Rave! Please please plea—"

"I said 'NO'! And no 'Rave' either!"

"Come on, Rae! Please?"

"Don't like, call me Rae! That's so like, totally un-cool man!"

"...but please, Rah—! Wait, what did you just say...?"

Raven clamped her mouth shut.

Silence.

"Aha! I finally caught you now, Slade! Hiding between McDonalds' trashcans, eh?"

More silence.

"'Kay, well we've only got vanilla! Who wants some?" Cyborg shouted from the kitchen.

_Awkward _silence.

"...Guys?"

"Uh, vanilla sounds good!" Beast Boy did the honors of breaking the silence.

"I shall retrieve the mustard!" Puppet in hand, Starfire announced, gliding towards the cupboard.

Turning to Raven, Beast Boy said, "Raven, are you coming?"

"No, I-I'll go meditate."

"But—the ice-cream! Who in their right mind would say, 'no' to ice-cream?"

"...Hah," Raven replied and began her short walk out of the living room.

Uncertainly, Beast Boy followed. "Hey, Cy! Keep my ice-cream warm for me, will ya?"

"Sure... BB," Cyborg watched Beast Boy's retreating form with a distorted face. "...whatever you say."

"So, Raven... you okay?"

"Just peachy."

"Uh... yeah... Beautiful day, huh?"

"How can you tell? There are no windows in the hallway."

Beast Boy scratched the back of his head and laughed nervously, "Good point..."

"So, how's your day?"

"Quit trying to console me, Beast Boy. What happened back there was just an accident. Leave it alone."

"But—but..."

"Leave it. I don't want to talk about it."

"Please tell me, Ravie!"

"I told you not to call me 'Ravie'!"

"I neeeeed to know, Rae!"

"Quit calling me all these dumb names!"

"Please, Rah—"

"SHUT UP! Shut. UP! I hate this! I hate you! Leave me alone! Can't you see I don't want to talk to you! I hate you! I hate your stupid jokes and I hate your dumb noisiness! I can see why Terra left you but not why she was ever interested in you in the first place! You're just an idiotic, attention-seeking moron!"

For once, Beast Boy was speechless.

"I mean—sorry," Raven's forehead wrinkled in thought, "It must have been my sentiments once more—do they seek to overpower me? Perhaps Rage... but no, they have all illustrated themselves. Happy... Rude... Brave... Rage... Knowledge and Wisdom as we speak... That leaves... no! It can't be! I must not show these emotions. The consequences would be catastrophic."

"Uh... Rae—I mean, Raven! ...do you need some time alone...?"

"What? Um... yes—I mean no!—please stay with me!" Upon seeing Beast Boy's face, she corrected herself, "No, I'm fine."

"...right."

Raven's metal door stood before them, uninvitingly. Raven looked up at Beast Boy, not understanding his emotionless form. Wait... looked _up_ at him?

Shyly, Raven posed the question, "Have you... gotten taller?"

Beast Boy grinned at her widely, then unromantically drew a foot to her face, "No, new shoes! Aren't they cool?"

Raven eyed the three-inch tall clown shoes and glared, "Whatever. I'm going to meditate."

"You do that then!"

"And um... I'm sor--" She gagged on her words.

"You're what?"

"I'm—never mind. Bye." She turned back to her door and unbolted it.

"Yeah... bye."

She was gone before hearing his response.

Beast Boy watched the closed door for a moment, then turned on his heel and shouted, "I scream! You scream! We all scream for ice-cream!"

From her room, Raven promptly ignored his exclamation. Her thoughts were scrambled and confusing. Had she almost told Beast Boy she was sorry? Perhaps Nevermore would give her answers. She spotted her meditating mirror on a shelf and set herself to the task of probing her mind.

The first sound to greet her was unexpected. _Quite_ unexpected.

"We want Freedom! We want Freedom! Give us Freedom or give us—"

"Raven? You're missing the strike! Come on! Get a sign and start chanting!" Happy shouted to an astounded Raven.

"What's... going on?"

From among the sign-laden emotions, Brave volunteered the explanation, "We're striking for Freedom! This is a country of the free so we want Freedom!"

"We're not _in_ a country of the free! And I know for a fact that we're in Raven's head! I know--" shouted Knowledge.

"We know you know! You always know!" replied the emotions.

"Wait... you're striking? You can't strike! You're in my mind! You're my emotions! Emotions don't strike."

Happy winked at Raven and said, "Well, now they do!"

"So that was all you? You all made me say those things?"

"Better believe it, Sistah!" Rude piped in.

"So, give us Freedom or give us Bea—"

"I want lollypops!"

"Books! I want the new Webster!"

"Books are dumb. I want a whole bunch of whoopee-cushions! And those clown shoes—"

"Sky-diving! I want to sky-dive! And go on Mount Everest!"

"Beware of what you wish..." Wisdom halted the screaming voices, "But dream of what you must."

The congregation stared at her for a second, then:

"If you guys get that, then I get world domination! And dumb kindergarten kids bowing at my feet!"

"...can... I, um... get the closet on the third floor, please...?" Timid asked shakily.

Raven watched her emotions with slight annoyance and bewilderment.

"Humph," then turning to Affection, "So what do_ you_ want? Worldwide sisterly love?"

Affection looked back at Raven dreamily, "No power and freedom could give me what I want."

"So... what is it?"

"Only the cutest most handsome—"

"Huh!"

Affection only sighed. The rest of her emotions began their chants again, "Freedom! Give us Freedom!"

"Freedom for the sentiments!"

Brave waved a poster in Raven's face. 'FREEDOM OR DEATH' was scribbled upon it.

"No! My powers are too unpredictable for this. I can't give you freedom. Even a small lapse in control would cause disaster. You all know this!"

"Of course we know this. We know much, Raven. We know of your dreams and wishes. We also know of your thoughts and—"

"Then you know by now that my answer's adamant. I said 'no', and that's what I mean! And clean up this mess. I don't want my mind to be a trash can." Raven gestured at the 'freedom' posters, glue bottles, spray cans and markers sprawled about the floor. She didn't bother to ask how the items got there.

"Aw, come on, Ravie! We just want a little free will. You never let us do anything fun!" Happy coaxed.

"No. I'm not explaining myself ag—"

Rude interrupted with a belch.

"—again," Raven continued, "And don't make me say uncharacteristic things either. I don't want to have to give Beast Boy a genuine apology."

"Did you just say—" Brave began.

"Beast Boy?" The rest of the emotions interrupted dreamily.

"Yeah... I did. Anyway, the answer's still 'no' and I'm missing my ice-cream because of this pointless conversation."

"But—Freedom!"

"No Freedom. Stop making me repeat myself!" Raven turned her back on her emotions and walked through the Forbidden Door too quickly to hear, "You know what to do, girls."

* * *

_Chop chop chop. _

Beast Boy deftly cut a carrot.

_Chop chop chop... choooop._

"This place needs some music, doesn't it, Mr. Cuddles?"

He looked at the inanimate teddy bear on the counter.

"Of course it does!"

Grabbing a towel, he dried his hands before reaching towards the boom box switch.

"..._When I'm not with you I lose my mind_,  
_Give me a sign,  
__Hit me baby one more--!_"

"GAH! What _is_ this, shitake mushrooms?" He switched to a different station.

"_--You love my lady lumps,  
__My hump, my hump, my hump,  
__My humps they got_--"

"AHHHH! My ears! They buuuurn!" He switched to the next station.

"-_-my age again?  
__What's my age again_?"

"Sweet! This is actually _normal_!" He began singing along as he cut his carrots.

"_Then later on, on the drive home__  
I called her mom from a pay phone__  
I said I was the cops and your husband's in jail__  
This state looks down on sodomy. _

And that's about the time that bitc—ouch!"

Beast Boy unbelievingly stared at his bleeding finger.

"Beast Boy, you _cut?_! I had no idea—I didn't know you hid behind a happy mask to hide your undying tragic sorrow! Is this a representative of your emotional pain inflicted on you by us being judgmental of your behavior? ...or is it _Terra_?" Robin yelled from the doorway; Starfire's astonished face was close behind.

"What? You cut?" Cyborg cried from the sofa, "Man, I thought only girls did that."

"What is this 'cutting'? Why is Beast Boy in sorrow?"

Robin looked uncomfortable, "Uh, it's sort of what girls do when they're unhappy with their lives."

Starfire looked ready to cry as she pounced on Beast Boy with a great glomp, "I shall comfort you in your feminine sadness!"

"Gah—Star, let... go..." Beast Boy choked as he struggled to breathe, "I'm—I'm... not..."

Raven chose this moment to make her entrance. "What's with all the commotion? This is the third interruption in one day!"

"Beast Boy cuts!" Cyborg yelled, as he pointed an accusing finger at the asphyxiating victim.

"No, I-I... don't!" He pulled away from Starfire's death-grip. "I don't CUT! It was just carrots! Those dumb short ones too!"

"Uh huh... sure, Beast Boy," Robin said slyly.

Starfire looked at Beast Boy understandingly and asked, "Is it the month of the time?"

Beast Boy was too shocked to respond.

"So this is what it's all about? Beast Boy's PMSing?"

"What? _What!_"

Raven grinned slightly, "Should I get the tampons, Beast Boy? Or should I say '_Breast Boy'_?"

The entire congregation laughed at Beast Boy's humiliated face.

"I don't... I'm not... I'd never... DUDE! I don't cut!"

"Haha—sorry, BB. We're not accusing you of anything. We're just—hey wait! You're not wearing any gloves!" Cyborg announced.

Beast Boy looked at his bleeding hand and blushed, "Uh, yeah... I'm not."

Cyborg was on the verge of tears, "Is that... i-is that... NAIL POLISH!"

"NO! I totally don't manicure my hands every day on Saturday!"

Starfire nearly keeled over with giggles.

"Dude, I seriously don't! My nails are just normally pink like that..."

The unintended joke sent everyone but Raven into a mad fit of laughter. Beast Boy's face turned the color of the cut tomato in his salad bowl, "It's not really that funny, guys... I-I mean, not-not really..."

Raven noticed Beast Boy uneasiness with the situation and felt a pang of guilt ripple through her. After all, she _had_ entitled him 'Breast Boy' when it was uncalled for.

"Can I see your cut, Beast Boy?"

"No! No, it's fine... I'm fine. It's all fine." He slowly backed away.

Raven gave him a flat look and hissed through her teeth, "Just let me see it!"

Beast Boy gradually extended his hand, a frightened look on his face. Raven's pale hand placed itself upon his and a blue energy engulfed Beast Boy's hand. The cut immediately disappeared and along with it, any sign of his 'cutting problem'.

"Uh... Thanks, Raven!" Beast Boy exclaimed.

"Don't mention it."

The rest of the Titans, finding the situation no longer entertaining, left to their normal habits.

Cyborg stayed long enough to apologize again, "Sorry man. Wanna play Mega Monkey?"

"Yeah... it's alrigh--" Beast Boy looked at his watch and gasped, "Dude, we just totally missed Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! I mean—" he corrected himself, "—yeah, I'm so ready to kick your butt at Mega Monkey!"

"I'll load the game!"

"Awesome! Get the popcorn!"

Raven rolled her eyes and muttered, "Boys."

* * *

"Farewell, cruel world," Raven said dramatically as she held a blade to her heart, "Fair dagger, do this unholy deed, and wash my pain to naught." 

Indecisive hands brought the sharp blade nearer—her life ebbing away as the space lessened between herself and the sinful object.

But before the deed could be done, a shaky voice inquired, "Raven? What are you—"

"Leave me, sir! For my welfare is no concern to thee!"

Beast Boy stepped closer to the dark mistress, captured by her moonlight beauty—her marble-white skin, her striking indigo eyes. Entranced, he drew near enough to behold the most petite of details: the frightened and trembling features, seeking for a source of comfort.

"Raven, I want to help. Please, let me help." He lightly touched her pale hand, surprised at the warmth that greeted him. Gently, Beast Boy took away her dagger, wide eyes following his movements. But Raven did not resist his doing. Almost... she wished for his touch to undo her fear—to help her.

"Dear sir..." she began.

Beast Boy placed a comforting arm around her shoulders, his other hand throwing the blade to the ground.

"I fear of this bonding. Such thoughts of it leave me in dread and terror. Continuation becomes unpredictability. At times, I fear thee, sir. I fear this-this affection that has grown between us."

"I'm afraid too sometimes. But that's why I'm here for you. That's why I'm here for both of us."

"Is thee here for me now, sir?"

"Yes, Raven. I'm here for you just now."

From the protection of his arms, she leaned up, her face visible as the moon to him. Beast Boy lowered his head, slowly closing his eyes and awaiting the future mere moments away.

Softly, Raven said, "Then thee must catch me when I fall..."

His face fell lower, a matching rhythm to her ascending features. Their balanced movements were slowly closing the gap.

So close. Only a moment more, a thought formed. And then, as their lips gently brushed—

Beast Boy woke up screaming.

* * *

**a/n:**

So... let's HOPE that was only a dream. Sorry Guys, but that's the angstiest we get. Any Rae/BB fan fiction more angstier than that goes in our mental trash can.

And if we missed anything or wrote something completely false, consider this fic an AU. We didn't do much homework on this.

Yeah, flames are welcome with open arms and so are comments on some random TT fanficcy clichés. We've only read the real mainstream ones.

If you're offended, then good for you. We love to hear about that in your message/review.

_Aia and Cid hereby declare that they do not have possession of Teen Titans, Blink 182's "What's My Age Again?", Britney Spears' "Hit Me Baby, One More Time", Black Eyed Peas' "My Humps", and shitake mushrooms._


	2. Where No Beast Boy Has Gone Before

**a/n**:

_Again, sorry to whoever came up with the title _Where No Man Has Gone Before_. Or... something like that. If you haven't noticed... there's a pattern here with the title chapters. If you mind that we're using the one above as a base for ours, message us and threaten or something. We'll change it. XD_

Okay... so this was a little later than we planned to post this chappie, but... it's all Cid's fault! -glares at Cid-. She had to go get herself in trouble and not get Internet connections! -shakes head- How inconsiderate of her! XD Anyhoo... this chappie's pretty long (try almost 8,000 words O.O), but at least it makes up for the wait. So, without further ado... _action!_

* * *

"The last time I ate a ball of cotton, it was white. And it did not taste very good." —Starfire

* * *

**Where No Beast Boy Has Gone Before**

A clap of thunder joined the swift sounds of rain.

Raven pulled her blankets closer and tried to dig deeper into sleep. She attempted to drone out the noisy clamor of the storm. And failed.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

She felt prompt vibrations ring through her mind and closed her eyes vehemently, trying to ignore what she could only describe as insanity. A loud cow bell replaced the thumping.

Raven ignored it.

'_Ravie..._' a dim voice spoke from the depths of her mind.

'No...' Raven thought unfocusedly.

'_It won't work Rae... quit trying to suppress us... you know we'll just strain harder..._"

A cold merciless laugh filled Raven's mind.

'No...' she repeated, but it was a weak attempt of ignorance.

'_Oh yes, Raven... you're holding back... but it's okay... we've got till dawn to settle this._'

The icy laugh again. This time, more like a cackle.

Raven said nothing this time. She lay shivering under her blankets, the dark clock in the corner of the room chiming softly. Faintly, she counted two strokes and listened as the harsh rain beat against the Tower.

'_Rae... do you know what time it is?_'

Raven was silent.

'_It's time, Rae... you know the rest right?_'

Raven shivered and muttered, "…What are you?"

A tinkling laugh of wind chimes.

'_You know who I am, Rae-Rae... _'

'Right,' Raven thought tartly.

'_Right!_'

An image of a girl cocking her head filled Raven's mind, standing as if considering something.

'_You know what, Rae? I think I'll sing you a song. A really nice pretty lullaby for you to sleep. Doesn't that sound _enchanting'

Raven heard the cruel laugh again.

Softly, a rather repugnant and obnoxious melody started, _'Hush little baby don't you cry... momma's gonna sing you a lullaby!_'

'Get out of my head!' Raven thought vehemently.

The voice paused slightly, but continued louder, almost shrieking, '_Hush little baby, don't say a word... mama's gonna buy you a mocking bird!_'

Raven's head buzzed with a million pictures. She couldn't stop the flood of images that engulfed her. Raven winced at all the smiley faces and pink.

'_If that mocking bird won't sing... mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring!_'

'Stop...' Raven thought.

'_If that diamond ring turns brass, mama's gonna buy you a looking glass!_'

"Stop!" she shouted.

As if her mind finally began functioning again, she leapt out of bed, shivering with the cold.

"Get out of my mind," she said tersely.

'_Ravie, talking to yourself is a bad sign... it can lead to doctors... and scary white rooms. We don't want that._'

"Don't tell me what I want," she trembled from standing on the cold floor, her pale feet bare.

'_I _know_ what you want. And right now, you'd rather be warm under your soft blankets, dozing off to blissful sleep..._' the voice paused.

The icy laugh.

'_... But I won't let that happen._'

Raven was indecisive for a second. She was confused... cold... afraid of what this voice could be... and _terrified_ of the pink. She felt this fear deep within her body, and it wanted release. She drew a shaky breath. Was there much of a choice?

'_What's the matter Ravie? Afraid you might be going insane?_'

The pitiless laugh again.

_'Don't worry, Rae. By sunrise... you will be. And then you'll surrender. Yes, Rae, you'll give me exactly what _I_ want._'

"Fine. I won't stop you."

'_What are you talking about Ravie? Is the lullaby getting to your head? Dear me, I've accomplished my mission!'_

Raven slightly smirked, already heading towards the door, a set purpose in her mind.

'_Oh, so I have! Pray tell, what is this great plan of yours? You know you can't get rid of me... there aren't many options, Rae. Face the truth; you can't do anything about it. So just give up now. Let go of your powers, Raven. By tomorrow morning, you'll be defeated anyway._'

Raven pulled the door open and considered those harsh words. There really wasn't much of a choice. She felt weak. Unable to do anything. Powerless. Words meant nothing to this strange voice.

"You win."

'_You're becoming easy prey, Raven. Have you really sunk so low? I'm almost... disappointed!_'

Raven's mind tumbled with exhaustion. It would be so easy to lie down and let this voice mercilessly overtake her. But as she stepped over the threshold, a new will shone through her.

"I told you to get out of my head. You didn't listen."

'_Now what kind of a host would I be then? To actually _listen_ to my losing quarry? Tsk tsk...you've learned nothing, Ravie._'

Raven was silent. She lined up her thoughts, considering them coherently, and then sighed. She'd better do this while she still had the stamina for it.

'_Wait. What are you thinking, Raven? Not that. You can't be thinking that!_' the voice was alarmed.

Raven entered the silent hallway, doubts still flooding her mind. Was she serious? Did she actually want to go through with this?

'I've wanted to do this for some time,' she thought, '...Now I just have a better background to support it.'

* * *

From deep within Raven's mind... eight voices were shouting in panicked tones. 

"She can't do this!" Happy protested, genuinely alarmed.

"'Twill is the end of us! Does she not realize the grave consequences of what she plans!" Knowledge added.

"If you ask me, she's just being stupid and an idiot," Rude was sure to say. "She's too dumb to understand that we were talking to her."

"She was under pressure the entire night! I told you not to sing your preposterous songs! I knew something like this would happen," Knowledge argued.

"And you _would_ know!" Rude snapped.

"I told all of you quit your senseless jabber to her! And that lullaby was ridiculous, Happy! I knew better of you!"

"I thought it'd help her sleep. And it went fine until everyone else discreetly joined the conversation!" Happy gave the accused uncharacteristic glares. "But I'm okay with suicide! Totally okay!" she added happily.

Rude gave her a disgusted look.

"Well, I'm not! I still expected kindergarten servants and world domination!" Rage exclaimed.

"And I wanted whoopee cushions! But I don't think I'll find any of them in he—"

"No swearing! This is a kids' show, remember?" Brave admonished. She was busy drawing another 'FREEDOM OR HOMICIDE' poster.

"Humph." Rude looked defeated.

"In any case, we will not be receiving anything if she slays herself. We should decide on a course of action," Knowledge said.

"Let's try talking again!" Happy suggested.

"Didn't that kind of not work?" Rude asked.

"...but we can try!"

Rude yawned. "I'm not going to. You do it. I think everyone here owes me a nap."

Brave snorted, but didn't comment.

"Fools remain fools if blindness is their path," Wisdom said vaguely.

"Sure they do."

"It is the open-minded that shall prevail."

"Riiight. So what's this I hear about naps? I think it's a good idea for you, Wisdom."

Wisdom didn't look upset by the sarcasm. She glided to a spot and gracefully set herself down, picking up a Shakespearean book for entertainment.

"So... any ideas on what we're gonna do?" Happy asked Affection and Timid, the only emotions who had yet to voice their opinions.

"I foresee a happy ending," Affection said dreamily.

Happy blinked.

"How can you _foresee_ a happy ending? We're not psychic..."

Affection shrugged.

"Wait... _are_ we psychic?" Happy clasped her hands together, "Wowzers! We are, aren't we?"

Affection gave her a blank look, "Um... no, we're not."

Happy looked disappointed, "Oh."

She was about to say something else when Timid said shakily, "Um... everyone? R-Raven's in the kitchen... and sh-she's opening the cutlery drawer."

* * *

Raven drew a deep breath. 'It's now or never' she thought. She gripped the long knife and held it a foot from her heart. 

Then she wavered on her decision. 'Maybe this is just a little ridiculous... what if this voice isn't a demon that wants to take over the world?'

As she considered this, another part of her thought, 'Then what is it?'

'It's dangerous enough to destroy my friends, through me. I can't allow that.' With somewhat of finality, she drew another deep breath, making a dramatic effect of what she hoped would be a swift death.

"Good-bye world," She whispered, "Not that you actually liked me in the first place."

Then she brought the blade crashing down.

It was the longest second of her life. The knife fell slowly, pale grey hands gripping the wooden handle until knuckles shone in the moonlight. Her face terrified of her decision; her mind shrieking at her to turn back, but it was too late to turn back. Too late to do anything but wait for the momentary pain... and then death.

It was so close to the end. So close to the cold waters of the beyond. So close... but—

"Raven!"

—Not close enough.

Her hand stopped; the blade an inch from her heart.

"Dude, Raven! What are you _doing_!" Beast Boy's voice exclaimed from the entryway.

Raven examined her position. Was it just a little odd that she was kneeling on the tile floor, at two in the morning, about to commit suicide?

"Nothing. I-I'm just—"

"You're practicing Romeo and Juliet too? Awesome! I can totally help you! Wasn't it like 'Romeo, Romeo, where're you dude, Romeo?'?"

"Um..." Raven decided not to comment.

"So, you're playing Juliet, right?" He leaned his face close to hers and said, "I'm totally awesome at playing Romeo! Just not the kissing scene," he twisted his face in disgust. "That part's so... ew."

Raven briefly raised her eyebrows. She would have thought that Beast Boy would give any chance to be able to kiss a girl. Or was he referring to the fact that he could kiss any other girl but her?

"Wanna do the balcony scene first?" Beast Boy asked eagerly.

"Uh... no, Beast Boy—"

"Then you wanna go straight to the ending? I know that part too!"

"No, I'm not—"

"The funeral? I can act dead! See, watch!"

"No, Beast Boy! I'm not—"

She didn't get to finish her sentence: In his display of acting dead, Beast Boy staggered precariously and fell with a slowness that caused him to miss the planned destination. He fell on Raven instead of the floor.

He barely missed the knife Raven still clutched in her hand, but the object was forgotten. In his fall, Beast Boy placed both of them in an awkward position. Their faces were nearly touching, only an inch of space between both of them. Beast Boy couldn't help the thought that crept into his mind, 'Déjà vu, much?' remembering his dream.

They gazed at each other. Something faintly pulled between them and they drew closer.

Raven slightly leaned up on her elbows, a confused expression furrowing her eyebrows. Then, as Beast Boy's hair lightly brushed her brow...

"Beast Boy! Get off of me!" She exclaimed.

"Oops... sorry. Accidents happen, huh?" He stood up, helping her up as well.

She gave him a general glare and picked up the suicide knife, thankful that her friend wasn't killed by the object that might have been her end.

She was about to put the blade away, but Beast Boy gasped, "Dude, that's the knife I cut myself with today! Well, uh... yesterday I mean. What a coincidence!"

Raven was surprised he knew what 'coincidence' even meant, but said nothing about it.

"Yeah... 'what a coincidence'. And, I was meaning to ask: what are you doing up at--," she glanced at the digital clock on the microwave, "--two-thirty in the morning?"

Beast Boy laughed nervously, "Funny that you'd mention that... I had this really creepy dream. And it creeped me out, so I thought I'd play videogames and beat Cy's score and then try going back to sleep!"

Raven looked at him suspiciously.

"What kind of dreams?"

Beast Boy looked slightly uncomfortable, "Uh... ones with people killing themselves... and talking like that dead guy who wrote Romeo and Juliet..."

"Oh," Raven said disappointedly. So much for Beast Boy being haunted by the inner voices too.

"But you were in the dream!" Beast Boy said. "And you were really old too. And like, this tall!" He emphasized her height by waving his hand in the air.

"Great..." Raven said sardonically.

"And I was there—"

"Friends!" An ecstatic voice interrupted. "You are here as well!"

Beast Boy and Raven whirled around and speechlessly watched as Starfire descended into the kitchen.

She held out a strange blue polka-dotted contraption and exclaimed, "You celebrate the Kazorfka also? It is wonderful to know that you enjoy the Tamaranian night dances and worships!"

They stared at her dumbfounded for a moment, then Raven said, "Um... actually, we're done with the Karzorka celebration, Starfire. We were heading back up just as you came in. Right, Beast Boy?"

"No, we wer—"

Raven gave him a glare that made him wince, "I mean, yeah! We're totally finished with the Karmork thing! And it—uh, was awesome worshipping the um... uh—Tarka! Your fire god! So, see ya!"

They hurried out of the kitchen before she could inquire about anything else.

"We do not worship fire gods..." Starfire said skeptically.

* * *

Raven was furious. 

By now, she had a clear idea of everything that had been happening that night. She was surprised and angered that it took her long enough to figure it out though, but like yesterday, she needed answers. Scratch that... she _demanded_ answers.

The first sound that reached her in Nevermore was unexpectedly expected.

"Ravie!" someone whined obnoxiously, "don't die on us, honey! We're here to save you!"

Raven didn't raise an inquiring eyebrow; she didn't bat away Brave's 'FREEDOM OR EXTERMINATION' poster; and lastly, she didn't snap at Knowledge for propping up her glasses and reciting her newest _This I Know_ speech— she got straight to the point.

"What in the name of Azar do you think you were doing?" she exclaimed, "Do you even realize what you almost made me do? Can any of you even fathom what could have happened if Beast Boy hadn't come into the kitchen? Obviously, you didn't! Let me spell it out for you then! _I could have committed suicide!_ Died! Deceased! Perished! Passed—"

But by then she stopped her ranting. It was obvious she lost them somewhere in the middle of it all: they were staring into space distractedly.

"You said—" Happy started.

"Beast Boy..." they chorused dreamily.

Raven blinked at them. What did Beast Boy have anything to do any of this?

She tried again, "The point being: quit creeping me out with chanting voices, stop singing, stomping in my mind, and do me the courtesy of explaining why you drove me insane and made me almost commit suicide!"

Rude snapped out of it first, "We're striking! For Freedom! And unless you plan on giving us some Freedom any time soon... I'm bringin' out the heavy artillery, sistah!"

She took out a moss-covered popsicle.

Raven gave her a flat look and muttered, "Ew..."

"Yeah, Rae. Give us Freedom! That's all we're asking for!" Brave volunteered.

"Just a teensy weensy meensy eensy weetle bit!" Happy squeaked.

"Pwease, Rawie!" Brave shoved Timid in Raven's face. Timid put on her saddest, cutest, most astounding puppy-dog face.

It didn't work.

Brave tried Rage next. The angry, red emotion exploded:

"You promised me paradise!" Rage shouted as she shook and strangled an adamant Raven, "I wanted world domination and you neglected me! You didn't keep your promise to me! How could you, Raven? _How could you?_"

Raven didn't respond.

"We wanted Freedom, Rae! And you abandoned us like sacks of unwanted clay!" Brave said dramatically.

Raven said nothing.

Her emotions took this as a sign of surrender, "We'll be good sentiments next time, Ravie! Give us Freedom—"

"—or die an untimely death!"

"We stand for liberty, Raven! Take that away and we shall retaliate! I know of all your weaknesses, Raven. You cannot deny us—"

"Shut up!" Raven shouted; her expression was livid, her voice hysterical.

Her emotions obliged, more out of fear than obedience.

"Fine! I give—have your Freedom! Get your whoopee cushions and Websters and world domination! Just, leave... me... alone! All I ever wanted was sleep! That's it! That's all I ever wanted in the first place!"

Her hood flew up to hide her enraged face. Her emotions huddled together, unsure of what to do. One brave emotion stepped from the group though. She peeked under Raven's hood and whispered, "Raven...?"

The girl didn't respond for a moment. Then, she straightened up, looked down at Brave, and turned.

Before stepping out of Nevermore, she looked back icily and in a deathly-quiet tone, said, "You want Freedom?"

Her cloak billowed open, and Raven stepped over the Nevermore threshold.

"You've got it."

* * *

Beast Boy lazily stretched that morning. His hand brushed on Mr. Cuddles for a moment, but he ignored it. Momentarily, he was happy. It was another good day for him. And, as he looked at the digital clock in a clothes heap on the floor, he was glad to note that it was only eleven in the morning. 

He stood up, yawned, and went down for breakfast.

"Good morning Titans Tower!" He greeted the main room generally.

There was no reply.

"That's weird... there's usually someone here by now..." Beast Boy pondered to himself.

But optimism ruled out any worries, "Great! No tofu fights with Cy today!" He set himself to the task of making a breakfast of 'soybeany goodness'.

The sound of a turned page attracted his attention though. Beast Boy turned to see Raven reading on the main room couch. Then he noticed the teapot on the stove.

"Oh, hey Rae! Hah! Get it? _Hey_, _Rae_? See, it rhymes!" He laughed at his own pathetic joke.

She didn't respond.

"Okay... well, good morning to you too!" Beast Boy went back to his tofu, taking Raven's silence as an everyday custom.

"So, you want something, Rae? I'm making a yummy tofu breakfast! You know you can't resist it!"

Raven stood up, placed her book down, and expressionlessly made her way to the kitchen.

Beast Boy tensed in case she was going to do something drastic to him for calling her 'Rae' at least three times. But he was left befuddled when she made herself a cup of tea and went back to her reading.

Even then, the idea that something was wrong didn't dawn on him. He kept cooking his tofu.

"Suit yourself, Ravie. You know you'll regret it."

This time, he was sure she was going to blow up. Beast Boy turned to see her get up again. She picked up a chair and dragged it to the windows. His eyebrows drew together in confusion when she placed her tea down and put the book in her lap as she sat down.

"Okay... well, you enjoy the view then," he said, "I'll reveal you my great tofu-cooking skills if you wanna see!"

Raven didn't reply.

Beast Boy finished cooking his meal and joined Raven by the windows, placing his food in his lap and starting with the mush-like cereal first. But something from the view caught his attention.

"Dude, Raven, did you just see that?" Beast Boy stared at a great fish that had jumped and done a flip in the water surrounding the Tower.

"I bet I can do that so much better! D'you think it was a whale? It had these jiggly fins and blew water from its back." He dropped his toast and imitated the creature, waving his arms like a jellyfish.

"Maybe it was one of those sharks you see on TV! It looked so cool! Did you see it, Rae? It was awesome."

Raven stared at the window blankly.

"Maybe it was an anaconda! One of those wiggly snakes from the Amazon... Dude! If we like, caught it, we'd make a fortune! And then they can all name me the... Anaconda Boy!"

Raven's book slid out of her lap.

Beast Boy bent to pick it up, "Here Rae, I think you dropped this. So anyway, maybe I'd be all famous and"—stars shone in his eyes—"they'd call me _duuude_."

He placed the book back in her lap, and then he noticed something. Despite the fact that Raven's silence was natural to him by now, and her creepiness sometimes extended to her ignoring and not commenting on anything he said, he believed there was one thing Raven would never do. And at that moment, he caught her doing that very thing.

Raven never drooled.

"Uh... Raven?" Beast Boy waved his hand in front of her face, but got no response.

Cyborg then made his entrance from the garage where his T-car was newly polished, "Yo BB! Isn't this kind of _early_ for you? Don't you get up at two?"

"Yeah, sometimes. But dude, check it out! Raven's like... blank today."

Cyborg wasn't sure how to respond, "Uh... isn't she usually blank?"

"Yeah, but she's not even talking!"

"…Isn't she usually not talking?"

"Yeah, but... she's not even reading! Or drinking tea!"

Cyborg was shocked, "Woah, now, that_ is_ serious."

"And she didn't laugh at any of my jokes today!"

Cyborg gave a hoot of laughter.

"Man, she _never_ laughs at your jokes!"

Beast Boy frowned, "Sometimes she does..."

"Yeah, riiiiight."

"What is it that you discuss, friends?" Starfire asked as she and Robin walked into the main room.

"Where've you two lovebirds been?" Cyborg asked shiftily.

"'Lovebirds'? I do believe that is a type of parrot, Cyborg. I do not see any birds," Starfire answered.

Robin didn't notice Cyborg's implication, but he was flushed for an entirely different reason.

"Cyborg! Round up the Titans! After days and weeks of frantic searching, I may have found a clue on..." he whispered the next word, "_Slade_."

"What? Man, I thought you gave up on him months ago."

"Gave up? How can you give up on..." he whispered the next word again, "_Slade_?"

Cyborg's eyebrows rose upwards, "Oh-kay... guess you haven't. But y'know, Robin, maybe it's time to _let go_? You know, move on..."

Robin looked shocked. "Let go? Move on? He's an apprentice-seeking psychopath on the loose! You can't just ignore the situation when it involves," he whispered the next word, "_Slade..._"

"Uh-huh... well then, why don't you go find more on—" he lowered his voice and whispered, "_Slade..._?"

"Good idea, Cyborg! I'm glad you're seeing things my way." Robin turned back down the hallway and left a befuddled Starfire in the living room.

"I greatly fear for Robin in his hard trials," she told Cyborg quietly, "It seems that his mind is most preoccupied with pursuing thoughts of Slade..."

"Don't worry, Star. Someday, he'll accept that Slade's gone for good and move on. Until then... just pray."

"I shall follow your advice and do the praying."

"Uh... you know, that's not really what I—"

"Dudes!" Beast Boy interrupted from the windows, "Help!"

"What is wrong, Beast Boy?" Starfire asked as she floated towards her other friends.

"It just happened... in like, a second... it's so... horrible!" He wailed.

"What is horrible? Please inform us!"

Beast Boy gulped a shaky breath, "The tofu..." He helplessly gestured at the food he had accidentally dropped on the floor.

Cyborg gave him a flat look. "That's _it_? You dropped yucky tofu on the ground? We thought you were being murdered here or something."

Starfire was about to say something comforting to Beast Boy, but then she noticed the drooling Raven.

"Friends... why does Raven salivate as she stares into the distance of the horizon?"

"Uh... yeah. Why does she?" Cyborg wondered.

Beast Boy momentarily forgot his dying tofu. "Raven? She's fine. Been like that since eleven. I think she's medituting."

"Are not her eyes closed when she does the meditating?" Starfire asked.

"Yeah, well... Raven's special... she can do it with her eyes open."

"Does she not usually repeat three words as well?"

"Sometimes..."

"There may be something wrong with our dear friend! We should call the man of medicine!"

"You mean the doctor, Star?" Cyborg cut in.

"Yes, the doctor of healing!"

"Uh... maybe Raven just wants to be alone?" Cyborg suggested.

A look of understanding crossed Starfire's face. But before she could reply, Robin shouted from the next room, "Star, come quick! I think I found something on..." he lowered his voice, "_Slade_! Bring the Jump City map! I think he's hiding in a candy stand..."

Starfire obeyed, picking up a folded map as she floated to the computer room, and said, "I shall return soon!" over her shoulder.

Cyborg shook his head sadly at Robin's obsession and turned back to Beast Boy.

"So... wanna play videogames or something?"

Beast Boy looked back at the silent and blank Raven, "Yeah, okay."

"Which one?" Cyborg held up a few games as he shuffled through an appropriately named box ('The Coolest Brain-Cell-Destroying Things in the World').

"Mega Monkey!" Beast Boy shouted as he jumped over the couch and picked up a game controller.

"You play that every single day. Don't you wanna play something new?"

Beast Boy thought hard for a second, "Uh... no."

Cyborg snorted, but gave in.

Just as the game started loading and the two boys comfortably arranged themselves on the couch, a sound echoed through the Tower.

_Ding Dong._

"You wanna get that, Rae?" Beast Boy shouted as the game started.

No reply.

"Come on, Ravie! We're really busy here! Please?"

No reply.

_Ding Dong._

Cyborg volunteered instead, "Pause the game, will ya, BB? It's probably just fan mail."

Beast Boy complied and watched as Cyborg walked into the hall. He heard heavy footsteps cross to the front door. Cyborg returned almost instantly.

"Booya! Check it out!" He shouted ecstatically, "It's the new car parts! My baby's gonna love this!"

He picked up the weighty cardboard box and sprinted out of the room, forgetting Beast Boy completely, only aware that he could now make repairs on his beautiful T-car.

Beast Boy stared after his friend, his game controller limp in his hand, and said, "I didn't know Cy had a baby..."

* * *

Cyborg arrived in his garage in mere moments. He put the box beside his lovely car and, too delighted to wait any longer, ripped it open. 

He murmured a Christmas song as he dug through the packaging foam and bubble wrap. His hands met something solid.

"_Jingle Bells, Robin smells, _

_Raven laid an egg..._"

Gingerly, he brought out the solid item—another miniature box—and dug for more car parts.

"_Beast Boy keeled, fell through a wheel_

_And Stafire flew away._"

He brought out two more minute boxes, laying each beside the other near the car.

"_Jingle Bells, Robin smells, _

_Raven laid an egg..._"

Cyborg pulled out the rest of the car parts, a sum of five, and began opening the first, careful with the surplus of bubble wrap.

"_Beast Boy keeled, fell through a wheel_

_And Stafire flew away..._"

He pulled off the wrapping, was about to hoot in joy when he saw a speck of metal-grey, but immediately dropped the item, and screamed.

* * *

Beast Boy was bored. Again. 

Cyborg still hadn't returned from his 'beautiful baby' and one-player on Mega Monkey got dull quickly. Robin and Starfire were still looking up Slade's possible 'next course of action', although most of the Titans considered him gone by now. So, the only thing Beast Boy had left to do was...

"Hiya Raven! How's medituting going?" Beast Boy asked enthusiastically as he waved a hand in Raven's blank face...

"Sweet, so wanna do something?"

"Maybe we can... play videogames!"

"No? Then we can... go to the beach and learn how to swim?"

"Hmm... we can... make a huge dinner and get to know each other better!"

"Raven?... is there something wrong?"

"Are you ignoring me?"

"...Is it a girl thing?"

Then, a small light shone in Beast Boy's face. He finally understood what was wrong with Raven. He was sure this was it. Nothing except for this could have made Raven act the way she did now. It _had_ to be this.

"Rae? Is it..." he lowered his voice dramatically, "...you know...?"

Silence.

"You know...? T-The thing... girl thing... You know? That thing?"

Silence.

Beast Boy flailed his arms around frantically, "The thing! Y-you know... the once-in-a-month thing!"

Raven's face remained blank. A small line of saliva was trickling down her chin.

Beast Boy was growing desperate.

"C'mon Rae-Rae! It starts with a P! Uh... five... SIX letters!" Beast Boy counted his fingers.

Silence.

"You know what it is by now, right?"

Silence.

"That's it, isn't it? You need more of those... _other_ t-things?...Of course you do!"

Silence.

"Well then... never fear! Beast Boy's here!" He shouted heroically.

"I'll get you exactly what you need!"

Quickly, he dashed into his room to arm himself against the evils of... _the isle_. He brought the essentials: doomsday devices, spying equipment, Robin's bird-a-rangs, and a gas mask. On his way out, he picked up a camouflage suit.

"Don't die on me, Raven! I'll be right back!"

He put on his backpack of equipment and went out into the world.

Cyborg was in shock and dismay. He couldn't believe what he was seeing.

"_Chiiickuu_!" the fuzzy little animal squeaked. It jumped up on the cardboard box and began to do something Cyborg could only identify as a dance. Four other fuzzy animals mimicked it and jumped on the box as well.

"_Chicku! Chiiicku! Chickucku_!" They chorused in their song.

Cyborg shook his head in disbelief: these were his car parts dancing. He opened his mouth to say something, and then clamped it shut like a fish.

"Chicku?" one of the metal-shielded animals asked as it jumped in front of the stunned Cyborg. Immediately, he flinched, finding his voice.

"Stay away from me, you furry freaks!" he shouted at the charming creatures.

"Chiiiiicku!" the animal screeched, offended by Cyborg's speech when it was only attempting a greeting. It leaped back on the box and was comforted by its four other friends.

"Yeah, you better run!" Cyborg spotted a thick burlap sack on the garage floor. Swiftly, he picked it up and attempted to capture the grey-furred creatures.

"Chi—eek!" They dispersed from the box, each landing incredible yards away. Their steel shields protruded spikes, a painful defense they were sure would work.

"So you guys like to play rough, huh? Well so does Cy!" He picked up a stick.

A bit more barbarian-like than he would like to admit, Cyborg leapt towards the nearest animal, bringing the branch crashing on the cardboard box. He missed the creature.

"Chicku!" The animal shrieked as it soared another five yards into the air.

The rest of the small pack snickered from around the garage. Cyborg dived for the next wide-eyed creature.

As before, he missed.

"Cowards! You ugly guinea pigs! Get over here and fight!" He leaped towards another animal, the smallest of its pack.

"I've gotcha now!" Cyborg advanced towards the little creature with a glowering look on his face. Just as he raised his combat device, a squeak attracted his attention.

"_Chickuk_!"

Cyborg turned to see the first creature he had challenged perched on his T-car.

"Hey! Get your furry butt off my car!" He lost his nerve as he lunged for the animal. All he knew was that a revolting thing with a spiked back had just jumped and seated itself on his most prized possession.

But just as he prepared his sonic cannon and was about to blast the thing, the animal leaped.

Cyborg stopped three feet from his car, and watched as the thing landed on the smashed cardboard. He lunged back for it.

This time, it took moments to catch the animal. Maybe it wanted to be captured, he considered, as he brought it back to the burlap sack. But as he prepared to thrust the squirming creature into the thick sack, he noticed something.

Taking advantage of Cyborg's preoccupation with the other animal, the smallest one had jumped _into_ Cyborg's car. Not quite learned in the ways of driving, the animal, however, noticed the shiny, jingly keys in the ignition. It turned the sparkly keys.

Cyborg couldn't even get the scream out before the creature did another minor change to the running car. It changed the gear from _Parked _to _Reverse_, and said its first English word.

"Oopsie?"

* * *

As the fourth hour of Slade-searching came to a chiming close, Starfire audibly sighed. 

"Robin? Perhaps we should attempt another search tomorrow? It grows late."

Robin didn't turn his head to acknowledge her statement, but he replied nonetheless, "Just a few more hours, Star. I know I've got something here!" His masked eyes scanned the computer print-outs.

"See? Look right here. Do you see this S-shaped object? I just know it's got something to do with him!" Robin pointed at an assortment of advertised straws that sold at Shop Smart for $3.99.

Starfire wasn't sure if she should comment.

"And look at this! Look at the hollow, orange eyes of this stuffed snake! They obviously belong to..." he lowered his voice, "_Slade..._"

"Robin, I do not wish to disappoint you, but perhaps we should... let go? Would it not be better if we moved on?"

Robin scowled at Starfire, "Star, he's dangerous! Don't you remember what happened back then? I _know_ he didn't die that day in the cave! He's alive, Star! And I'm going to be the one who catches him. I'll be the one to catch..." a maniac glint shone in his eyes as he whispered the next word, "_Slade..._"

Starfire didn't press him any further.

"Very well, Robin."

Robin nodded to himself as he picked up another magazine—_National Geographic_—and flipped to the first page. His breath caught in his throat.

"Star..." he began shakily, "This-this is it... This is where he's been hiding! Do you see this temple! It's him! He built it! He's hiding in it! Starfire, we found him!" He leaped up, sending hundreds of printed papers to the floor. Swiftly, he ripped the page of an ancient Mayan structure from the magazine and turned to Starfire.

"We have to go after him! Before he can get away again! We have to capture him this time! We must find..." he lowered his voice, "_Slade_..."

Starfire sighed, but followed her teammate as he walked to the main room.

"Titans! I've got his location! Move out!" Robin shouted in his commanding voice once they reached the wide room.

Silence.

They both scanned the living room, finding no apparent sign of life.

"What has happened to our friends?" Starfire inquired.

Robin's eyes lit up, "It's him! He captured the Titans! He's going to make orange apprentices out of all of them! And then he'll... hide them in a tomb of the Mayan pyramids forever!"

Starfire was about to sigh again, but immediately noticed the silent Raven, immobile by the windows since breakfast.

"Raven?" she asked as she flew down beside her friend, shortly joined by Robin, "Why have you not moved since the morning?"

No reply.

"Surely it is the time of dinner now, no?" Starfire continued.

No reply.

Robin checked his magazine cut-out impatiently.

"Star, we _need_ to find him!" he said urgently, "This can't wait! You know how much Raven has to meditate every day. She's fine."

Starfire looked at Robin briefly, astounded that he sounded normal for a change.

It didn't last.

"But not him... he won't be fine by the time I'm through with him! I'll capture him, Star! I'll capture..." Robin lowered his voice, "_Slade_...!"

He then took out his communicator and said, "Come in, Beast Boy! We've got his location. It's likely we'll need back-up!"

On the other end, Beast Boy looked sheepish on an isle floor, in the middle of a gooey substance and many marshmallows, "_Hey, Robin! Uh... can you hold on for a second? I'm sort of in the middle of— _eep!"

His voice was cut off when the great substance engulfed him.

"_Eek! Attack of the giant jelly marshmallow! I mean—uh... can you hold on for another second?_"

Robin looked at his communicator confusedly.

"_So... uh, you were saying?_" Beast Boy asked once he finished stuffing the substance in the store garbage can.

"Um... Slade?"

"_Right. I'll be there in a couple of—gack! Not again!_" Beast Boy returned to his combat with the stubborn substance.

Robin clicked the communicator shut.

"No time to waste, Star! We have to go after him!"

"Very well, Robin..." she said as they both left the Tower on another unfruitful mission to catch Slade.

"...very well."

* * *

Beast Boy left Shop Smart three hours after he entered it. 

It should have only taken him ten minutes to get Raven's _things_. But of course, a series of ill-fated events occurred to him as soon as he stepped over the goofy entryway.

First, it was the monster vacuum cleaner—"_Um, hi? Is this the Shop Smart Security? Uh, I sort of have a problem with some of the stuff on sale... Yeah, can you get down here? Your Home Cleaning isle's... _rebelling."

And then it was the evil china dolls he strolled by—"Dude, help! These dolls are like, evil! Can someone—ouch! Hey, let go of my hair! Let go—wait, no! Not the uniform! Give it back!"

And then the yellow school supplies, the squirt guns, the big flat TV, the great book of dinosaurs and by then he'd lost count.

Just as he was entering _the isle_, he passed by the Cooking section, and was of course, misfortunate enough to be bombarded by the marshmallows and 'the substance'.

Eventually, he'd gotten the _things_, and by then, he didn't even care that he was a boy brave enough to enter the dreaded isle. He paid his $5.99 for the package and left.

Of course, that didn't end his problems.

On his way back, he was delayed by incoming birds, pebble-throwing five-year-olds that can't understand the concept of a green animal, and a sudden gust of wind that Beast Boy could easily identify as a tornado.

Finally, he managed to get back to the Tower. He walked three steps on the rocky shore before he realized it. And then he groaned uncharacteristically.

He was holding an empty Shop Smart sack.

* * *

The T-car was quickly moving in reverse, and a gaping Cyborg was almost too stunned to stop it. 

"Chicku?" One of the fuzzy animals asked politely. A congregation gathered to watch the car.

Cyborg didn't answer; he dashed towards the moving vehicle, running with all his might.

The car rolled out of the garage—which was 'luckily' a slope—and bumped through the rocky gravel towards the waiting shore. The creature at the wheel was afraid and excited at the same time, squeaking "Oopsie! Oopsie! Oopsie!" at each bump in the gravel.

Cyborg leaped past the rocks on the shore with swift agility, with only one desperate thought in his mind to drive him to his limits.

The T-car reversed speedily, and was ten yards from the shore. The creature lolled its tongue out.

Eight yards.

Cyborg jumped past a boulder and leaped through the Titans' training area.

Six yards.

The fuzzy congregation held its breath.

Four yards.

The creature in the car leapt into the air, swiftly landing in a brush pile.

Two yards.

Cyborg threw himself his remaining few feet to catch the car.

_Splash_.

The car lodged deeply into the waters around the T-shaped Tower. It stopped when it was a few yards in. And then, as Cyborg looked up from the shore he had landed on, the small animal that had leapt from the car said, "Uh-oh..."

_Boom!

* * *

_

"Good day, Starfire! Would you like more mustard on your bread?" Raven asked happily.

"Why yes, Raven! I believe I would," Starfire returned a large smile as she mustarded her toast at the two-foot dollhouse table.

Raven brought out a mustard bottle two feet wide and high, and placed it in front of Starfire.

"Enjoy, honey!"

Starfire beamed.

Raven took her own toast to mustard it and took a sip of her mustard tea.

"Oh dear..." she said when she dropped some mustard on her Tie-Dyed shirt.

"It is no problem, Raven! Please, have this nap of kin to clean!" Starfire handed Raven a bright orange napkin with a bottle of mustard as its insignia.

"You are too kind."

Starfire smiled.

She enjoyed a moment of silence with her mustard party guest and then...

_Snorkel Snork!_

"I shall attend to the door!" Starfire announced ecstatically as she jumped out of her miniature dolly seat and opened the door to the tree house.

"Dude! I totally love what you've done with the doorbell!" Beast Boy exclaimed as he stepped over the 'Mustard Welcome' mat, with Cyborg close behind.

No one commented on the mustard-decorated tree house.

"Shall I fetch some gnorza? It is a celebratory drink on my planet intended for guests," Starfire said as she set up five more chairs around the small polka-dotted table. "Please, sit."

The newcomers obeyed, while Starfire left to retrieve the celebratory drinks.

Beast Boy scooted closer to Cyborg. "So, Cy..." he said mischievously, "I've been thinking about what you said last night... and I sort of came up with this brilliant idea..."

Starfire returned with the gnorzas and passed them out to each guest.

"And this great idea... is well... you know..."

Cyborg looked down at Beast Boy through a mouthful of mustarded snow cones, "Yeah?"

"Um, well..."

Starfire listened in to the conversation, eager to find out what Beast Boy's great idea was.

"It's kind of early to bring it up, but..."

Cyborg took a great swig of the gnorza.

"Yeah, BB?"

Beast Boy dropped to one knee and rushed the question in one breath, "_Willyoumarryme_!"

Cyborg's face was blank for a moment and then, "Sure, little man! Why not?"

"Sweet!" Beast Boy exclaimed and brought out a metal hexagonal ring.

Starfire watched the conversation with excitement, "Friends, what is this marriage? I have heard of it on the box of vision you call TVs..."

"It's a bond, Star," Raven said politely from her blue-striped seat, "When two people that love each other bond like that, it's called a marriage."

"A bond...?"

"Yeah, a bond," said the familiar voice of Robin, who had inconspicuously appeared. He was wearing a Tie-Dyed shirt and a monocle.

Starfire's eyes shone with stars, "Robin... would you like to perform this ritual of bonding as well? I am sure it is a friendly thing, no?"

Robin replied evenly, "Sure."

Starfire squealed happily and exclaimed, "Then let us join a bonding dance! We shall honor the Goddess of Mustard for the bonding of marriage!"

The happy congregation sang in a circled dance.

"_Yo ho! Yo ho! A pirate's life for me!_

_We pillage, we plunder we rifle and loot  
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!  
We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot  
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!_"

A rain of mustard began falling on the flowered field they danced upon. As each bonded friend jumped and leapt and danced and happily swept through the field, an orange petal from each flower blissfully circled their ritual.

"_Yo Ho! Yo Ho! a pirate's life for me!  
We extort, we pilfer we filch and sack  
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!  
Maraud and embezzle and even high-jack  
Drink up me hearties yo ho!_"

As each line was sung, the voices grew distant and blurry, blending together like the mustard rain, until Starfire heard Beast Boy say one last far-away thing to Cyborg, "So about that baby due in May..."

"_Yo Ho, Yo Ho, a pirate's life for me..._

_Yo Ho, Yo Ho, a pirate's life for me..._"

Starfire was swiftly circling away from her bonded friends, blissfully returning. Swift summer lightning lit up the sky... She distantly heard the happy drum of thunder... A yellow mustard bottle flew to her from the distance... and then—

Starfire woke up beaming.

* * *

**a/n: **

Okay, well... by now you've figured it out right? You're seeing the interesting pattern, ne? Hopefully, you are. Review on all the clichés we've used in this chappie, mention what the pattern is and you'll get... _another cybernetic cookie_! You can never have enough of those!

Also, if you want to know about the progress we're making on each chappie or a rough date we'll be posting next, you can go to our home page (Individually Packaged) and check the updates. Aia (the _non_-slacker -glares at Cid-) is always kind enough to take a moment of her time to keep you guys posted.

So, until next time!

Aia (Cid's having problems with her Internet connection at the moment... -cackles evilly-)

_We hereby declare that we do not take ownership of the songs we've used for this chappie: "Pirate's Life for Me" and "Jingle Bells" or... the TT version of it anyways. _

There's one line in the TT version that we altered though... let's just say that Cyborg would never sing about his precious T-car losing a wheel. XD


	3. How do you say I Hate You?

**a/n:**

Okay. We have no excuse. This is a year-and-a-half overdue. The writing style has even changed toward the end, but Aia believes in finishing what we've started. (Haha. Cid gets no commentary).

Again, we used a chapter title that was tweaked from "How Do You Say I Love You?" If that bothers you, let us know. :D

* * *

"It can't be any worse than that documentary on hot dogs Starfire made us watch." - Robin

* * *

**How Do You Say I Hate You?**

Robin glared at Slade.

"So after all this time, Slade... I've found you. It's just you and me now. One on one. I've waited for this day too long."

Slade didn't answer.

"You think you can get by with silence?" Robin burst into a cruel laugh, "You have _nothing_ to say to me? Well, let me do the talking then. I'll tell you a story, Slade. I think you'll like it."

Starfire's worried expression peeked from behind Robin. She was told to _stay out of this_; Robin had to deal with Slade on his own. But always the cautious alien, she was concerned with the situation.

They were standing in a Mayan temple, a ruin past restoration almost caved in from years of neglect. The limestone walls were laden with drawings of archers, healers, animals, and the paraphernalia of the past times. The air was heavy with tension.

There was a warning sign at the entrance of the temple:

Caution:

_This Mayan structure has been tested as unable to withstand severe weather, natural damage, human interference, and other destructive causes. It has been sealed away to prevent injuries. No loitering is allowed. Anyone found in the structure will be escorted to the nearest police station._

Under the federal sign, someone with a lack of spelling skills had rudely scribbled, _"Get yer buts away from me proparty!"_ Robin hadn't listened to either warnings, and now, Starfire feared they were in great danger.

"It started long ago," Robin began his story. He looked at Slade evenly.

Slade said nothing.

"Remember that day, when the H.I.V.E. first attacked? You left your mark then. I keep looking back on that question I asked so long ago, 'Who is Slade?'" Robin reminisced, "But it didn't take long for you to reveal yourself. What you did after that... trying to get to me through my friends... I'll never forgive you for that."

Robin's glowered hatefully.

"You thought you could team up with Trigon then, huh? Use Raven as your puppet... like you used _me_... and, what about Terra? You don't know anything about the word _friend_. Because that was your downfall. You sunk pretty low, Slade."

Robin smirked.

"'So what's the end of this story, you're probably wondering. I'll tell you."

He leaned down, hissing, "_This_ is the end."

Robin swiftly pulled out his metal rod, a maniac glint in his eye, and attacked. He ran the few feet towards Slade and leapt; in midair, he brought down his weapon, and hit his target.

Robin laughed cruelly.

"You're not going to fight back? I'm so disappointed, Slade. It's not like you to give up. But then again, you were always an unpredictable villain."

He barked with laughter again.

"Robin?" Starfire asked, concern etched on her face.

"Not now, Star. He's about to lose. I'll be the winner this time... for the _last_ time."

"I must insist on your attention."

Robin turned to look at her, keeping half a gaze on Slade at the same time, "What?"

Starfire shook her head, "Robin, this is not reasonable. What you are doing is—"

"Harsh? Inhumane? Star, he's the cause of our troubles! He started this! And now..." Robin looked back at Slade, "_He'll pay_."

"But—"

"No, Star. I have to finish this."

Robin turned back to Slade and prepared for another attack with the metal rod. He jumped and began a series of intricate movements that became a blurry outline.

Starfire sighed. She simply didn't understand Robin. There seemed to be no reason behind his actions, but she at least understood that this was important to him. That Robin needed to do this to finish his final fight with Slade. But _this_... it just didn't make sense.

Robin prepared to strike again. Starfire turned away and sighed again.

Robin looked down at his victim, satisfied, "No more apprentices now, Slade? There's no one here to save you. No one. Beg for my mercy! Kneel before me!"

The remains of chicken bones were now scattered uselessly across the floor.

* * *

"Okay, Raven..." Beast Boy said as he entered the kitchen for breakfast the next morning. 

"I know you're still medituting and don't want to be bothered, but—" Beast Boy brought out a checkers board.

"Can you play chess with me?" he said excitedly.

Had Raven been her normal self that day, she would have pointed out that they'd need a chess board for that, not a checkers one, and said no to the offer in the first place, but—she was not. She hadn't moved from her chair by the windows since the day before. No one noticed.

Beast Boy set up the board on a table in front of Raven and brought out the black and white pieces.

"You wanna be black right?" he asked.

Raven said nothing, but Beast Boy took her silence as acquiescence, and turned the board around to accommodate her reaching needs.

"Okay, I go first," he muttered to himself. "This little piece with a Dora the Explorer mark on it should go up, right?"

Raven stared past Beast Boy.

He moved the Dora the Explorer checkers set piece up one space and looked up at Raven eagerly, as if he'd finally accomplished an overachieving task, "Your turn!"

Realizing that she wouldn't respond, Beast Boy moved a black piece for her and glanced at Raven to see if she would agree to his choice of placement. She returned his gaze with a distant look.

So, in this way, they finished the first round. And Raven won. And Beast Boy yawned. And they were back to an awkward, one-person silence.

"Dude... there's nothing to do here!" Beast Boy complained after a few minutes. Then his eyes lit up, "Wait! I know what to do!"

He leaned across the checkers board to whisper in her ear, "We can watch TV!" Raven didn't respond, but Beast Boy was already standing up and walking across the living room floor. He found the remote coated in a blue fungus and oblivious, picked it up, and pressed the ON button.

"—_in other news, the House of Representatives has signed the bill promoting higher taxes and the final steps before—_"

"Boring!" Beast Boy changed the channel.

"_Crikey! Did ya'll just see that? Two rows o' sharp teeth that jus' bit right through the—_"

Beast Boy changed the channel.

"_And so I'm like, 'Dude, you've got like, serious issues! Can't you see that she totally thinks you're hot?' and so he's all like, 'No way, man! She's like—'"_

Beast Boy changed the channel.

"—_so here we have it, ladies and gentlemen, a new champion to conquer the famous Mount Everest. Meet—RAVEN!_"

Beast Boy grinned merrily, "Hey, Rae! Look, there's some person on TV called Raven too! And she's on Mount Everest! Isn't that awesome?"

Raven didn't respond from her window seat.

"_So, tell us, Raven—how long and difficult was your journey to the top of this incredible mountain?_"

The green-cloaked Raven on TV smirked and said, "'_bout two days. And it was actually pretty easy, seeing as I've got awesome superpowers and all_." Then she turned to the camera and waved wildly, _"Hey Rae-Rae! Check it out! I'm on Mount Everest!"_

The talk-show host mindlessly nodded, "_So, got any new adventure ahead that you'd like to share with the audience?"_

The TV Raven thought for a moment and then replied, "_Totally! I'm sky-diving in an hour and jumping off some sky-scraper in China without a parachute!_"

Beast Boy stared at the screen confusedly, and only one thought ran through his head.

_What's _Brave_ doing on TV?_

* * *

"You want some candy, punk?" Rage asked as she twirled a lollipop in her mouth. 

A dozen kindergarten students stared at the red-clad emotion eagerly as they nodded.

"Too bad!" She snapped and jumped onto the playground swing, carrying a bag of candy with her and popping another Jolly Rancher into her mouth.

"P-please, Master Raven?" A young girl wearing a red-and-white dress asked timidly as she walked up to Rage.

Rage glowered down at the girl with disgust and she began gnashing her teeth against the Jolly Rancher. "I said no! Get lost, you freak!" she shrieked.

The polka-dotted-dressed girl whimpered as she drew back into the crowd of hungry children. They all looked at Rage with saddened and forlorn faces.

Rage eyed them unhappily and demanded, "_What?_"

"N-nothing, Miss Raven!" A pair of twins chorused nervously.

"When's Teacher Barnes coming back?" a brave boy asked.

Rage glared at the boy, "Dang it! Quit asking such dumb questions! I don't know when your stupid teacher's coming back!"

A few children snickered while others looked shocked and perplexed.

The emotion rolled her eyes impatiently and snapped, "_Now_ what?"

"You said 'Dang'! You said a naughty, naughty word!" A peppy boy announced through giggles.

Rage looked at the children inexpressively, while her left eye started twitching. She bit through her lollipop and muttered, "Damn kindergarten kids."

Before the congregation could react, a cheery young teacher came back with bags of groceries for the children and announced, "Hi kids! I'm back from shopping! Would anyone like to help me put the bags away?"

"Mrs. Barnes!" a few ecstatic students exclaimed as others ran to the teacher to help with the groceries.

"Each of you can have some candy after lunch!" Mrs. Barnes said as she walked towards Rage with a ten-dollar bill.

"Thanks for looking after them," she lowered her voice as she handed the money to Rage.

The emotion stared at the money for a moment.

"No thanks. I don't take charity."

The teacher looked perplexed, "But it isn't charity. I'm paying you for looking after the children."

"I said I didn't want it!" Rage said heatedly.

"But you must accept."

"No! I don't—"

"Please, do take it!" The teacher was about to hand the money to Rage when the bill suddenly burst into violet flames.

The teacher blinked.

Rage stood up, an annoyed look on her face. "This is stupid."

"What-what just happened? How did you do that?" The teacher asked shakily.

Rage dropped the Jolly ranchers and left the kindergarten. So much for kindergarten kids bowing at her feet.

* * *

As the world was seemingly falling apart among the Titans, Cyborg was too engrossed in his own problems to mind them. 

He led a silent procession of furry grey creatures to the Titans' cemetery. Most of the other team members had buried deceased pets and creatures of the like there, but this was the first time the cemetery would receive an inanimate object in its grave.

Cyborg sniffed as he dragged the exploded car parts to a somber gravestone.

"This wasn't meant to be, my sweety. We were supposed to grow old together—and now—now—" he dropped off, choking back a sob. "Rest in peace."

"Amen," the creatures chorused and Cyborg blew his nose loudly. After burying the last pieces of his car, he turned to the creatures, smiling excitedly.

"So, who's up for pizza?"

* * *

"No, turn it a little to the side. No, that's not right, a little more to the left. Darn it, hold the camera up! And don't shake so much, Timid," Happy whispered loudly as she and Timid hid behind the kitchen counters, pointing a plastic camera in Beast Boy's oblivious direction. He was playing Mega Monkey on the couch. Timid shakily snapped a picture. 

"Okay, now get a shot of his hands. They just look so amazing from here. And then get another one of the side of his face. Rage keeps saying he needs to pierce those cute 'lil ears. I totally agree."

"What if-if he catches us, Happy? I'm so afraid of what he'll say if he sees us. It's like we're… we're…"

"Stalkers? Relax, Timid. He's just gonna grin his loopy mouth off and laugh. Don't worry about it."

Timid's eyes widened and she felt tears coming on. "He's-he's gonna laugh at me? Don't make him laugh at me! I'm going to be sad and cry. And I won't ever come out of Nevermore again if he makes me cry."

Happy smiled. "See? That's what I'm telling you, honey. Stop worrying about it. And get another shot of his head. I just love the way his hair sticks up right there. Makes me wonder what Raven's thinking being so mean to him all the time."

Happy glanced at Raven's immobile form by the windows. "And speaking of Raven, that girl needs to start moving pretty soon, or else all this BB hunting we're doing's not gonna help her much."

"I-I thought you said she can't come back yet. She's stuck in Nevermore because we've left her there. She must be lonely there all alone… Oh, that makes me sad all over again." Timid's hands shook as she snapped a picture of the back of Beast Boy's head.

"Nah, Raven's fine. She needs some solitary time. Maybe she's hosting parties up in Nevermore all by herself. She can imagine things up, you know."

Timid smiled a little. "D-do you think she's imagining Beast Boy in Nevermore?"

"Absolutely. She's gonna thank us once she's back out here. Hey—doesn't that mean we've gotta head back to Nevermore if she comes out? See, that's not fair to us. We should get more freedom than just that. Then again, Raven hasn't moved for two days. She probably needs to eat and stuff."

Timid nodded with little conviction. "I'll go back to Nevermore. This place scares me a lot. It gets dark at night and I found my cloak chewed a little at-at the hems this morning."

Happy laughed. "Well I like this place. You can do whatever you want here. And there's lots of Beast Boy to go around. Write a little paragraph about BB under that journal entry so I can read it later and put the pictures underneath. I'll bet you Brave'll love that. Make it descriptive too. I wanna smile when I read it!"

Timid shyly complied.

"Yep," Happy murmured as she angled the camera for another shot of Beast Boy as he poked his tongue out in concentration. "I definitely love this place."

* * *

Wisdom strode through the automatic sliding doors. The place smelled like an air-conditioned airport. It was, in fact, a library. 

"Oh my God," someone whispered. "It's Raven."

"Look at that cloak," someone else murmured. "She's changed it."

"That's so awesome."

Wisdom stared at the two teenage girls by the counter. She stared blankly. "Where's the nonfiction section?"

Their eyes bulged. "Oh my God," one of them whispered. "She's speaking to us. Oh my God, get a camera!"

"Perhaps you misunderstand me. Where may I find the nonfiction section?" Wisdom stared at them blankly.

"No, better yet! Get a recorder!" one of the girls gushed. "Then we can actually _record_ what she says to us."

Wisdom impatiently strode past the counter, into the nonfiction section.

"Oh my God, she's leaving! Get me a camera, Lucy!" Lucy stared at Wisdom's retreating back with awe.

Wisdom had a briefcase with her, which was not unusual. Inside were papers and photographs of Beast Boy. The pictures were random: a snap of BB's ear; one of his toes; another of his right elbow. One would wonder how they even got close enough to take one of his bellybutton. Doesn't his uniform cover that part of his body? Wisdom shook her head, blushing.

She sat at a faded desk in the nonfiction area, and started sorting through the papers in the briefcase.

Happy and Timid had certainly written a lot of comments in the BB journal. One read:

"_His skin is white like porcelain._"

The writing was illegible there. It seems as though the two had had a fight with the pen. It continued:

"_Scratch that. His skin is like a pile of green leaves. It makes you want to sink in it. His eyes are emerald. The emerald gleams in his eyes like a shiny stone. I want to stare at his shiny stones. _

_He stares at his videogame and his lips curve into the prettiest smile. His smile is pretty. His lips are red like cherry blossoms—_"

The writing is illegible again. There are pen scratches on the paper.

"_Scratch that again. His lips are green like luscious avocados. They are very pretty. I wish Raven was not dumb and thought so too. Maybe she would taste his luscious avocados. Yes Timid, I wrote that his lips are pretty._"

Wisdom raised her eyebrows, impressed. At least they had been considerate enough to correct their mistakes.

* * *

In Nevermore, Raven cursed her emotions. How rude. They had actually had the audacity to lock her up in her own mind? Raven would not stand for such disrespect. 

Enraged, she wandered within the wasteland of Nevermore. Posters still hung off the branches of trees and markers littered the ground. She wanted to meditate, but that would be impossible. She couldn't concentrate now that her haven was a jail cell.

It had been two days since the emotions had locked her up in Nevermore. Two days ago, she awoke feeling numb. She remembered the Emotions dragging her into Nevermore. They left her there, leaving and cackling like manic chickens.

"So long, Ravie!" Happy had waved, poking her tongue out at her.

Raven had screamed after them, but they were long gone.

Now she was all alone, stuck inside her own head. She tried to make herself feel better by thinking that things like this happened all the time, she wasn't a special case. But no. Getting kidnapped and thrown into your mind by your own emotions was not common. She was quite special, apparently.

Raven walked through each emotion's realm, trying to relieve her anger and sudden boredom. In Affection's realm, she stopped short. And gawked.

In front of her was the most hideous statue of Beast Boy she had ever seen. It was at least fifty feet tall. And it was made of gum. It was green, because it was covered in fungi.

The emotions had built a Beast Boy shrine.

Raven blanched.

* * *

Slade's large computer screens stared at Robin. They showed Slade's motionless face. Robin looked around, wondering where he was. He was wearing the cursed uniform that mirrored Slade's and he was weaponless. 

"Robin."

Robin whirled around, face-to-face with Slade. He was smirking as he neared Robin, standing too close for comfort. There was an army of African masks behind him. Giant masks, seven feet tall. They grinned savagely at Robin. Suspended in the air, they crowded around him.

Slade's eyes shone. He reached for Robin's uniform and suddenly shouted, "I'm going to rape you for no reason!"

And he did just that.

When finished, Slade flew into the air, cackling. His African masks laughed at Robin, who was staring up at them all frightfully.

"Oh Robin, what have they done?" Starfire leapt into the scene. She comforted Robin and wagged her finger at Slade. "That was quite mean of you, Slade. Kiddy corner for you."

And she hugged Robin until he could no longer breathe.

The African masks chortled at Robin.

Slade ripped off his mask and a rabbit hopped out of where his face should've been.

Slade's computers crashed on them all and—

Robin woke up gleaming.

* * *

**a/n: **Thanks for reading. Dora the Explorer doesn't belong to us, and neither does Teen Titans. 

Cybernetic cookie, anyone?


End file.
